Thunder filled the air, and the ground beneath it quaked. Massive machines charged through the forest, leaving only decimation in their wake. The sun set over the woods of Kathil III, and the snow was piled deep, the forest illuminated by the fires and embers that scattered through the darkening sky. The stench of death and burning metal assaulted the senses. Smoke stung the eyes. A mercenary MechWarrior had been separated from his company. His 'Mech was a wall of metallic vengeance. Broad, and stout, its entire profile from the shoulders up was obscured by its massive main gun. The entire machine swayed as he sprinted through the woods, his weapons brought to bear.
Even in all this machine's terrifying splendor, it was far from optimal working order. Its right arm had been blown completely off, and the armor protecting its main gun had grown worryingly thin. It was moving to a point which the mercenary commander had forwarded to this MechWarrior. The journey would take him around an enemy-occupied hill.
His 'Mech came to a sudden halt the moment he entered a clearing. Before him stood a BattleMech his IFF system identified as an opponent. His sensors tagged this rival as a Centurion. Its emerald green painted hull nearly camouflaged against the tree line. It stood tall, proud, a form resembling its namesake. It seemed to have only taken very minimal damage, a stark contrast to the mercenary's own 'Mech. On its right arm was its main cannon, which it immediately fired at the mercenary.
The mercenary turned his vulnerable main gun away from his attacker, allowing the opposite shoulder to take the blow. His advance towards the Centurion continued. He brought his gun to bear once again, and fired. The cannon roared, a shock wave filled the cockpit, interrupting the mercenary's breathing. The shell slammed into his attacker, causing it to stagger back as the mercenary pressed forward.
The Centurion grabbed a fallen tree off the ground with its left hand. By the time the mercenary had noticed, it was too late to halt his advance. The Centurion brought the tree trunk around, and struck the Hunchback with a force that would level fortress walls. Metal screeched under the blow, the already perforated hull protecting the main gun was torn open, and the tree crumbled into a thousand splinters, scattering across the clearing.
The Hunchback stumbled backwards, but recovered. The Mercenary fired the Hunchback's main cannon once more. The shell tore the Centurion's arm off at the shoulder, the metal arm falling to the snow below, its fist still clenching the remains of the tree trunk. The shot was followed by a single green beam, which carved a small, glowing-hot line across the Centurion's chest.
Again, the Centurion replied with a blast from its arm-mounted primary cannon, the shell plowed into the Hunchback's main gun, utterly demolishing the weapon.
Panic set into the mercenary's mind. He fired his remaining weapons, two lasers, as feeble as they were. He determined he could not win this battle, and reached down under his seat for the ejection lever. Before he could pull, the Centurion fired one final shot. For the briefest moment, the mercenary saw the shell rapidly approaching his cockpit. The round tore into the cockpit, caving in the Hunchback's head, and killing the mercenary instantly. The Hunchback fell backwards onto snow, dirt and ice kicked up and scattering around it.
That clearing would be both the mercenary's and the Hunchback's resting place for a very long time.
I really liked the training sequence with Lance in the sim pod the way his missed shots and the Panther’s mobility kept tripping him up made it feel really grounded, and that ammo explosion moment hit harder because you could see it coming just a little too late. The later MechBay scenes also stood out, especially him naming the Hunchback “Necessity” it says a lot about how personal this all is for him without needing a big speech. I was wondering, are you planning to lean more into Lance improving as a pilot soon, or keep that struggle and learning curve as a longer-running part of his arc?
Those are all aspects of the rough draft. While there are going to be some things that carry over, there are going to be some major changes. Most of which I am unwilling to spoil. But I will say that yes, he is going to struggle to improve his skill as a MechWarrior. And thank you for the kind words!
That sounds really promising I like that you’re planning to keep his growth a real struggle, because that already came through in the sim pod scene and made his mistakes feel meaningful rather than just setbacks. It makes the progression feel earned, especially in a setting where one wrong move can cost so much. Also can we discuss more on other social if you don't mind
Sure, I'll leave my Discord username in your guestbook. However, before we go any further, I have to inform you that I am NOT in the market for any form of art, any subscription services, or products of any kind. This is non-negotiable, and to try and change my mind is just a waste of time. I am not accusing you of such, but simply stating that has been an issue. But if you don't want to sell me any art, I am more than open to discussing just about anything else. I will repeat this statement when I share my Discord username.